Judy Brady, a feminist author, was born in 1937, in San Francisco, California. She earned her bachelor's degree in painting from the University of Iowa in 1962. She had been married for several years and had two daughters. She suffered from breast cancer as well. After being diagnosed with breast cancer in 1980, she became active in the politics of cancer. She has been actively involved in the women's movement since 1969.
Her essay "I Want a Wife" is an excellent example of satirical prose published in 1972. This essay first came into readers' knowledge through the pages of Ms Magazine. This essay depicts the lifestyle of a typical wife in the 1970s and is a radical and fresh viewpoint for that time. Because of the Women's movement, the Equal Rights Amendment passed in Congress and others, the condition of opportunity for women which was unequal and discriminatory has been improved from under 40 per cent to 50 per cent today. The severe recession that started in 2008 has today caused men to lose jobs more than women. Fewer than 40 per cent of mothers with children under the age of eighteen were employed in 1970, but today three-quarters work and 38 per cent of them are full-timers and work around the whole year. Because of this change in women's lifestyles, men were forced to be stay-at-home fathers and hence, the number of such fathers increased from virtually zero to about 160,000.
In the essay "I Want a Wife", Brady has portrayed how men think, act and feel. She has also shown her readers the demands and pressure put on married women by their husbands and society. She talks about the character and behaviour of men toward women. Here, she also describes the duties of a wife that she has to complete: her duties are keeping track of appointments, cooking dinners, hosting parties, and keeping the home clean. All these duties are divided into categories: childcare, housework, sexual availability, appointment/event organization, and putting her career aside. One can find what a husband wants to see in a good wife. In paragraph 4, Brady writes, "I want a wife who will take care of my physical needs. I want a wife who will keep my house clean. A wife who will pick up after my children, a wife who will pick up after me." She means the husband understands that a wife is to be on standby all the time around him regardless of what she thinks, wants, needs and feels. The wife's desires and interests do not matter; instead, she has been made to fulfil every demand of her husband. She has smartly used the repetition technique to emphasize multiple duties a was has to complete.
At the onset of this essay, Brady clearly stated that status - "I belong to that classification of people known as wives. I am A Wife. And, not altogether incidentally, I am a mother." She knows herself very well. As a wife, she is quite aware of her duties and roles. She has mentioned all those things that a wife has to execute each day. She says she is a person who depends on her husband in all ways. He sees himself as an economically independent person supporting her and others. She is expected to be a good "nurturant attendant" to his children, a good cook, a good babysitter, good host to welcome and serve his friends. She further mentions that a wife should be an obedient listener to obey his every command without any "rambling complaints about a wife's duties". He thinks that a wife should be sexually honest and loyal to him and she must ensure that her husband is sexually satisfied with her sensitivity to his sexual needs while he does not need to pay any attention to her passionate desire if his mood is not for it. He understands that he is not bound to adhere to monogamy. He can find a person more suitable as a wife than the wife he already has. He expects her to take care of children if they have any so that he is left fully free. Brady here means that a husband is above all responsibilities, rules of family/society and restrictions. This unfair treatment from a husband to a wife makes her see herself as a husband. And, she concludes her essay with a satirical line "My God, who wouldn't want a wife?"
Comprehension
1. In one sentence, define what Brady means by wife. Does this ideal wife actually exist? Explain.
Brady means wife is a person who disproportionately sacrifices lots of things to make her husband happy; who does not think about her own necessities in order to take care of children and do household work. I don't think this ideal wife ever exists. Whatever - tasks and responsibilities - Brady has mentioned would be impossible. Brady also describes a "wife" doing everything being very happy about everything, which is hard to imagine.
2. List some of the specific duties of the wife Brady describes. Into what five general categories does Brady arrange these duties?
The duties of the wife Brady describes are to keep track of appointments, cook dinners, host parties, and keep the home clean. These duties she has categorized into childcare, housework, a good bed partner, appointment/event organization, and putting her career aside.
3. What complaints does Brady apparently have about the life she actually leads? To what does she seem to attribute her problem?
Basically, her complaints are about the biased roles a married woman has to accomplish every day. This is why she wants to see herself in a reversed role as she says "I want a wife" so that she can do all that she wants to do. She also feels disappointed because she has to worry about and do everything but husbands are not generally expected to worry about anything in the same way. She feels upset because there are only wives who are to do housework, care for children, arrange appointments for the entire family, cook dinner, and above all sacrifice their careers for the sake of their husbands. Brady means the reason behind this problem is the unfair distribution of household-centric labour between husbands and wives.
4. Under what circumstances does Brady say she would consider leaving her wife? What would happen to the children if she left?
Brady says if she found a different woman more suitable as a wife, she would consider leaving her wife and would leave her first wife to take care of the children.
Purpose and Audience
1. This essay was first published in Ms magazine. In what sense is it appropriate for the audience of this feminist publication? Where else can you imagine it appearing?
This essay is very appropriate for the audience of this feminist publication because it criticizes the unfair expectations men have for their wives. This essay shows the readers that wives do an immense amount of labour in their daily life; however, that is unappreciated and completely unnoticed by their husbands. I think this type of essay could be appropriate in the opinion section of a newspaper.
2. Does this essay have an explicitly stated thesis? If so, where is it? If the thesis is implied, paraphrase it.
No, the thesis of this essay is not explicitly stated; it is implied. The thesis is that men's traditional and selfish expectations from their wives are unfair.
3. Do you think Brady really wants the kind of wife she describes? Explain your response.
No, it is because she herself feels overwhelmed by how she is expected to stay on top of the tedious labour she has to do in her daily life. She criticises the biased expectations of husbands from their wives. She feels upset that it is so selfish to expect anyone (wife) to take responsibility for everything. Brady implicitly says that there should be equal respect and treatment for both wives' and husbands' needs and desires.
Style and Structure
1. Throughout the essay, Brady repeats the words "I want a wife." What is the effect of this repetition?
This repetition shows that each man desires to have a wife in his life and unfairly and selfishly expects her to be in his life just to make him content, and help him to meet his goal to get his needs fulfilled.
2. The first and the last paragraph of this essay are quite brief. Does this weaken the essay? Why or why not?
I don't think briefness has weakened the essay because there is enough context to make the essay meaningful to the readers, and whatever Brady wants to express contains all the information she likes to share with her readers.
3. In enumerating a wife's duties, Brady frequently uses the verb arrange. What other verbs does she use repeatedly? How do these verbs help her make her point?
Along with the verb arrange, Brady has frequently used care and make sure. These verbs are connected with "organization" and "caregiving" which are generally left over for women in the family. The purpose of the frequent use of these verbs is to focus on all the different ways that women are expected to provide care and arrange things.
4. Brady never uses the personal pronouns he or she to refer to the wife she defines. Why not?
The main reason behind not using any personal pronoun is that the "wife" Brady defines is not an actual person but a concept. The term "wife" has been used as a representation of all the roles women are traditionally expected to perform in married life.
5. Comment on Brady's use of phrases such as of course (2, 3, and 7), needless to say (3), after all (7), by chance (8), and naturally (8). What do these expressions contribute to the sentences where they appear? To the essay as a whole?
The purpose of these phrases is that whatever Brady talks about is to be taken for granted by a wife and the wife is expected to do. This has been in practice for a long time and each woman is brought up being taught to accept household chores, host parties, welcome guests, cooking meals, etc. normally. On the other hand, men are tension free from such tasks; they need not bother themselves with such things, and men are unable to understand the time and energy such tasks require; thus, the immense amount of labour she does remains unnoticed.
Vocabulary Project
1. Define each of the following words as it is used in this section.
2. Going beyond the dictionary definitions, decide what Brady means to suggest by each of the following words. Is she using any of these terms sarcastically? Explain.
Yes, these terms have been used sarcastically. The reason is to show how selfishly husbands hold these unfair expectations of wives. A wife is expected to know every need and desire of others without asking them what they really want. For instance, Brady talks about wanting a wife who puts things in their "proper place". The proper place for things is subjective, and they may have different ideas about where something might go. However, by "proper place" Brady means that she wants a wife who will know exactly where Brady expects to find things and to store them according to that expectation.
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